You know when your heart sinks and you can’t quite place what makes you feel like that? Or when you just want to cry, and there’s a constant lump in your throat that you can’t seem to shake no matter what you do. Well, I’m kinda going through one of those times right now. I don’t know why though, I mean, shouldn’t I be happy? All of my exams are done and everyone’s life is planning out just fine. I have nothing to be sad about, I’m just feeling quite low.

I guess there are many things going on in my head and so many people to be concerned about. My whole life has changed this year and I can’t quite say whether or not it’s for the better or worse. At first I thought it was good. Going to college was scary, but I made friends and they’re all pretty nice. New friends. People that don’t judge you for your past, what you look like, but for who you are. I guess that’s the special thing. I’ve never really experienced such things before.

But music is on a low. I don’t ever seem to have time to listen to it anymore. To go searching for all those hidden jewels that cause such emotion you understand what life is about, why it’s worth living. Songs that give you such a thrill that even days after listening to it, you’re still thinking about the meaning, searching about the band and constantly replaying it over and over in your mind. It was only a few months ago where music shaped my life, and now it’s slowly dwindling.

Piano. A way I can express my feelings.

Everything and everyone is changing around me. People are advising me on my path to adulthood and to be honest, I don’t want to go there. It sounds such a scary place. Exams and more exams all leading you to a university that depicts you by a letter and decides your fate. Or maybe its fate that decides your university. I’m a big believer in fate. I feel that it guides your life so you eventually end up on your deserving road.

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